Dear Diary,
I hate life today. I am miserable...
If i had a journal/diary, that's probably what today's entry would've started out as. I am miserable. Not just sick, or tired, or thirsty (because I am all those things) but miserable. I HATE being pregnant. HATE it, loathe, detest, despise, abhor, resent, am repulsed by... i think i almost have all the entries in the thesaurus for hate... this "wonderful" thing called pregnancy. I wont go in to the symptoms; but if you WANT to know you can google 8 weeks pregnancy symptoms and see what comes up. I HAVE ALL OF THEM, to the umpteenth degree and I want to cease to exist. I spent the last hour sitting in my tub with the light dimmed letting the water flow over me as I cried. Pathetic isn't it? but it's the only place there are no smells, just clean water. Any where else and the urge to vomit overtakes me. I don't know how I am staying composed enough to write this. Has any one ever gone insane from pregnancy? I'm on the precipice, and if it were a literal one I'm afraid I'd jump.
I'm not trying to be dramatic, it's simply all true. My mother said it will pass. She said I'll forget (pregnancy amnesia). That I will not think on it again. I hope with all my might that she's right.
Deary Diary,
Today was a bad day.
Love,
Nichole
:(
I hate being pregnant(and to think this is the third time I am doing this to myself) with a passion,but once you feel that little one start to move all your cares will go away. 2nd Trimester is know as the "honeymoon" period of pregnancy where you feel great. So 6 more weeks and it will get better I promise you and if it doesn't then you and I can change spots because by then I will be entering my 35 week and would do anything not to be huge and gross. This will pass and before you know it that tiny little baby ( who is making you feel miserable) will be here. You can do it and if you need anything just let me know.
ReplyDeleteaww. big hug, love. the babe will be worth it.
ReplyDeleteI know I'll be miserable when I'm pregnant. I constantly think about how much I look like my mom, how much our personalities are alike, how we even have moles in the same exact places... and I asked her how her pregnancies were and she said she actually lost weight until near the end because she felt sick the whole time.
ReplyDeleteSO, then I said "Well, was it better Jacki? I heard every pregnancy is different" (with a lot of people it can vary from child to child) and she said nope. Basically this means I'm totally screwed.
Maybe you'll be like my aunt though and after she reached a certain point she felt amazing for the rest of her pregnancy!! Take one day at a time, and take comfort in knowing that you have so many people who love you and are more than willing to hear you complain for the coming months just because they know you need to. I'm one of them :)
LOVE YOU!
*with Jacki
ReplyDeleteObviously my sister has yet to go through pregnancy herself. Whatever, you knew what I meant!