So today I find myself 7 weeks pregnant. Oh. My. God. Exactly how I got to this I don't know. (okay we all know HOW we get ourselves to this point, but the particulars are still blurred around the edges).
Immediately these thoughts have come to mind;
I'm too young
I'm not done with nursing school
we don't have a house
we're too young...
I'm not ready...(is there an echo??)
Those and about a thousand other hugely 'minor' details are all racing headlong through my mind. Am I excited? Sure. am I terrified? Definitely. Do I know how to reconcile the future I'd been planning with this new one... I have no idea.
BUT. I know that all things work for the Good of those who love him, and who've been called according to his purpose. And i know he hasn't given me more then I can handle, and I'm scared enough to recognize the joy I should have right now, will probably come when I've had a minute or two to process the inevitable.
Your prayers are greatly appreciated! I know this is a happy thing. I'm just enormously overwhelmed.
<3
Nichole
Omggggggg!!!!!! I would be SO scared, but SO excited at the same time if I were you. Don't worry, I think the scared part comes first because it's supposed to. Becoming a parent is scary, it's not a perfect science as we all know, and I think it's a really good thing to have that initial fear. It shows you care - not only do you care, but you care a lot. Can you imagine if someone found out they were pregnant and just thought "Whateverrr"? The joy will CERTAINLY come! Let yourself be scared and take some long breaths.
ReplyDeleteIs it sick for me to say I'm jealous? I have been bitten by the baby bug for sure. I keep thinking "I can't have a baby right now, I don't have health insurance that covers it, I don't have a job" etc etc. I think no matter how many things you DO have straightened out in your life, there are always excuses why you're not ready to be a parent. Really, who IS 100% ready to be a parent? Some days I secretly hope I'll wake up pregnant... but it's good I'm not I suppose. It will happen when it's supposed to happen.
wow! 1) i had no idea you had a blog, so yay. and 2) you're PREGNANT!? congrats! you're going to make an incredibly cute pregnant lady ;)
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